Anger Management

Anger its a strange thing. I did used to get worked up by the smallest of things. However over the past few years that seems to of died down rather a lot, I just generally chill out and let things slide and take there natural course. Rastafarians have got nothing on me when it comes to being chilled out. Sometimes I'm so chilled people think I'm dead. I swear if I hadn't had to get up and go to the toilet that time I would of been six feet under.

The reason I bring this up is today at work I was pulled aside by my boss so that he could tell me that I wasn't doing my job properly. This is, hum how can I put this, complete bollocks! He just generally doesn't like my work attitude and my colleges, which is work hard but have fun while doing it. His diserplinery procedures seem to of been putting me back to what I was origanally employed to do, looking after the IT building systems and advising the helpdesk staff on calls, but with extra pay which, well lets face it is pretty damn good really. The reason this has pissed me off is that I found out that he's been ringing around after I've been to jobs to see if I've been there.

Years ago when I'd found this out I would of spat back in his face and said "Fuck you you stupid nazi mother fucker, just because I don't conform to you and your ex-millitary way of doing things doesn't mean I'm not doing my job, which I'm doing a damn site better then your doing yours!" Then gone and found another job.
Now I just said "Ok" and started looking for another job.

I miss the old me.

No, I didn't injure it by doing that.....

My left wrist is really begining to bug me now. It's been sore since around the middle of last month. When I tilt down or left as far as it will go it hurts. I know the obvious answer to this is the same as the joke where the guy goes to the doctor and says
"Doctor it hurts when I do this with my arm"
To which the doctor replies "Well don't do that then"

Unfortunatly it also hurts when I put any pressure on it, such as lifting and carrying stuff, which I have to do quite a bit for my job. Also I have to often have to tilt my wrist as far down as possible, to play my bass. So I'm hoping it gets better before the next spree of gigs we have coming up. I think that maybe part of the reason why it's happened we have spates of doing no gigs then do loads all in a relativly compact time. So I can't see these breaks and then huge periods of stress on it being very good for it.

I think I might bandage it up to give it some support over the next few days and see if it gets any better.

A wiser man then me once said:

"Sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes the bar, wal, he eats you."

Todays cool gadget is....

A wireless radio system for my bass guitar. It's very cool and cute and lets me have a good wonder round, admitadly where we rehearse there's only really enough room to take a couple of steps in any direction, about the same distance you could achieve with a conventional lead. However combined with the new extra long strap I bought I can now have a good old guitar swing and do my now trade mark 80's heavy metal guitar poses. Come on you know you'd all be upset if I didn't do them.

Combined with the bass case I bought, which due to the special shape of Thunderbird guitars means it had to be a super expensive specially designed one, has left me rather skint.

This basically means that while I won't be able to go out or eat for the rest of the month I will however look super cool with my guitar. Now if only I had enough money to buy the batterys for the transmitter part of the radio.......

The Scott and the Aussie. And why do I bother?

Ok seriously is it written somewhere that when I have a good night and meet someone nice that other people that I care about have to suffer? And have a terrable time?

Is it too much for me to ask that you guys actually express your feelings for each other? Really is it? No giving up a trip across a few continants doesn't express how you feel, nor, sonny jim, does playing a song about her, especially one about how she loves you and isn't leaving.

Have I taught you nothing about lonelyness? Do you guys really want to end up like me when you could be so much more? god If I could slam your heads together right now I would!

I just feel so helpless about this. Like there's something I could of done. like if I wan't having a good time with a good looking and charming lady I could of done something.

As a aside music is: Hammerfall, Child of the Dammed. Which may be appropriate. Or may be completly random.