So You want to be a rock super star?
The lights die out the stage goes black, the hands of the crowd start to clap as a cry o goes out from the crowd like the first rays of dawn, they are as unstoppable as the daylight it's self and demand a answer. The bass tolls. Then I snap back to earth "Will?"
"Will?, is there?"
"huh What"
"is there something you'd rather be doing then technical support"
"no"
And it's true, almost. What I'd love to do is play my music for a living, I'd take the huge paycut that would be involved without a problem. Other then that I love what I'm doing and want to keep doing it. I do what I do with a lot of heart I love doing it quite frankly theres always something new to learn which is my greatest pashion, learning, but not studying. I hate feeeling that I'm learning but love it when I've learnt something.
Unfortunatly I have always done the opposite of the norm which generally lands me in trouble, in a work case where everyone looks busy but does nothing, translates to I look like I'm doing nothing but am actually busy. I think this is pretty cool.
My boss however Doesn't. In fairness due to my insomnia I've made some silly choices about things in the morning, but I can't help feel that I'm being descrimanated against on a age basis. Yeah you hear about people being descriminated against on age as there old but what about (comparativly) young like myself. Seriously I'm facing predudice every day, I shit you not.
Mmmmm Bed Please
Insomnia, yeah it used to be somthing I had that I thought made me cool.
"Yeah I can stay up all night and not need any sleep"
Cool yeah really impress people, I can go for several nights on the run without sleep. Like now I haven't slept apart from a couple of hours on Saturday, this isn't a intentional I've been out clubbing all night, this is a I can't fucking sleep thing!
When I mention it to people they often say, they suffer from it too. Trust me you don't. Being awake at half one in the morning isn't nsomnia, being awake at six in the morning with out any sign of nodding off for the third day in the row is.
I'm constantly ratty and short with people, my relationships with everyone suffer and all I crave is somewhere quiet to curl up a sleep. Trust me though nowhere is quiet when you have insmnia, the little hums and occasional clicks of things sound so fucking louad they drive you insane,
I'm so fucking tired but with no chance of sleep. It's fucking my mind up. Damn it!